Nowadays, having one night stands without a condom isn’t an option. Unless, you are willing to bungee jump without a cord, it will never be worth it. We now know how risky unsafe sex is. So, if you can’t get hard with a condom, we will give you some clues to fix the issue and enjoy stress-free sex at will!
It definitely sucks but…there’s always a solution, let’s have a look at the most common ones!
Can’t get Hard with a Condom? Here’s why…
Maybe… You Hate Condoms
Some people don’t mind condoms and some do, we are definitely not equal when it comes to that. However, when you are not in a relationship and STD free (or at least know which ones you have and the consent of your partner), a condom is a shield for your penis that protects you from very nasty diseases. It will always be worth it, if you want to have fun.
At the end of the day, we have evolved from very thick (think leather condoms or… animal intestines) to super thin condoms that can be made with or without latex.
So, what’s bugging you?
You can’t feel anything when you put it on? Or maybe, your erection goes away as soon as you have to put it on? Alternatively, maybe it feels weird during penetration?
Let’s be bluntly honest here. The truth is that a condom will never be as comfortable as unprotected sex, period. However, unprotected sex is not worth the risks. Like most things in life, avoiding STD’s comes with a caveat. We can’t have it all. (1)
But do not despair, there’s a few tips that can help you out!
Tips for When you Can’t get Hard with a Condom
Masturbate with a Condom
Yes, I know – he can’t be serious? But, yes, I’m dead serious.
The vast majority of men struggle or can’t get hard with a condom, and tend to emphasize the negative side. To sum it up, it’s something like that: put the condom = lose boner = no sexy times. It sucks.
However, that’s can also become a vicious circle. Because during your next happy moment, you will think about the previous shitty experience and the nerves will prevent you to get hard, once gain.
It’s a fact, anxiety or nervousness doesn’t help when it comes to erections.
Therefore, masturbation with a condom can help you put an end to this evil circle of anxiety.
Next time you’re alone and chill, have some fun and put a condom on. Then, do your business. Eventually, after a few weeks, putting a condom on will help you trigger an erection. Because now a condom equals sexy times!
Keep it going!
Ditch the Porn and “Zenify” Yourself
Masturbating while watching porn can quickly become addictive and lead to a disaster when it comes to sexual intercourse.
To avoid changing your brain’s reward system, stop cold turkey. It may be hard but it’s worth it! Once, you are off abnormal sexual stimulation, your normal sexual responses in front of another human being will improve.
Also, keep the masturbation to a minimum or don’t masturbate at all before meeting up your hook up. Indeed, you will want all of your juices and sexual energy when the time comes.
Wait Until You are Good to Go
Sometimes, there’s two types of erection: there’s the nearly there erection and the look at the massive veins one!
If condoms tend to make you soft in a second, maybe you just need to wait a bit longer until your erection is 100% ready to go. So, enjoy the foreplay for as long as it takes and when you can’t handle it anymore, put your little shield and go for it!
Also, when you are ready to go, don’t lie on your back. Instead, stand up straight, plant your feet on the ground and put the condom on.
Finally, sex should be a moment of relaxation. Consequently, if you are naturally nervous, it won’t help when the time comes. So, to reduce your levels of anxiety and/or stress, try meditation, self-hypnosis or yoga (yoga will boost your self-esteem too)!
You Can’t get Hard with a Condom – Take it Easy
During sexy times, don’t put extra pressure on yourself. Be you, whoever that may be. If the nerves start creeping, breathe. Take a long breath that lasts at least 4 seconds then exhale as slowly as possible. Repeat the process until you are calmer.
Remember, sex is a game and there’s two players. So, you are not alone. Your hook up can also play with you to get you going and vice versa.
Also, if you are nervous, drunk or/and tired, don’t make a big deal out of it. Maybe, it won’t happen tonight and you know what, that’s fine.
If you are worried about being able to pleasure her or that your penis is not big enough or anything else, disconnect your brain. After all, if this is about to happen, that means she likes you, right?
So, be yourself and most importantly, enjoy yourself, even the awkward moments can be fun!
This article was written by Michael King.
(1) Condom-associated erection problems: behavioural responses and attributions in young, heterosexual men. Brandon J. Hill, Stephanie A. Sanders, Richard A. Crosby, Kara N. Ingelhart and Erick Janssen. Sex Health. 2015.